Grandma loves the Boston Red Sox. This has been a recent love affair as far as I know. She seems to have been swept off her feet by a certain Dustin Pedroia and Kevin Youkilis. She is on a first name basis with them, recounting games with "Kevin didn't play last night," or "Dustin made a hit." I think this is very positive for Grandma. She has a genuine interest, whether it be a love for the game or for the fellas, in baseball. She even cut out their schedule from the newspaper and keeps it right by her side with all her medications. This gives Grandma something to think about besides her various ailments, and I love the Red Sox for that.
JoJo
Friday, September 23, 2011
The Dentist's Office
On Wednesday, Joanna and I took our grandmother to the dentist. This sounds benign, doesn't it? Even dull? Then why after every trip to this office, are Joanna and myself filled with the kind of white hot rage only seen in Vietnam movies?
Let's be honest, taking a 90 year old woman anywhere is painful. I appreciate the fact that the elderly move at a much slower pace than we do, but sometimes it seems like it would be easier to just put her in a baby bjorn and carry her around like a baby kangaroo.
But nobody takes my suggestions, so instead, our grandmother uses a walker; A big red cumbersome beast from Hell that hinders more than it helps. A process that should take 5 minutes takes an hour. We live in a very fast paced time, and it's jarring to have to slow to a crawl when we are with our grandmother.
Joanna and I are not at all fond of this "dentist." He reminds me of the dentist from "Little Shop of Horrors" only not as warm and kind. Granny was to only have one cavity filled, so imagine our surprise when he came out and told us that he basically decided "fuck it, let's just yank the sucker." He of course said that in a more delicate manner, but the meaning was the same.
We were in that terrible waiting room with it's terrible radio station for an hour and a half, so we should have figured he was up to something. This guy has that effect on my grandmother, the effect all men have on her; basically, she will just do whatever they say.
This is a common trend for her generation. My grandmother doesn't trust women, and she especially doesn't trust women dentists. That's why we have to drive a ridiculous distance to take her to this particular dentist, instead of the woman right down the street. Ironically enough, the woman dentist actually ran over her own grandmother with her car "accidentally", so maybe granny is right not to trust her. It would just be SO much more convenient...
Back to the rage. I'm not sure where it is our impatience comes from-it might be the fact we live in a world of instant gratification; everything is fast and concise and speedy. The english language has been abandoned in favor of letters representing words, and everything is "140 character or less." This isn't a good mindset when dealing with the elderly.
We DO need more patience and the mixed feelings of anger and guilt tend to offset that need in favor of the need for a drink. We yell at them because they are too slow, then feel guilty about it. Joanna and I have started to try to look at the humor and irony of it all. We try to laugh instead of yell. This hasn't really been working thus far, but at least it provides a strong argument for the legalization of marijuana. If people were to smoke pot before taking granny to the doctor, everything she said would be fucking hilarious.
-Kat
Let's be honest, taking a 90 year old woman anywhere is painful. I appreciate the fact that the elderly move at a much slower pace than we do, but sometimes it seems like it would be easier to just put her in a baby bjorn and carry her around like a baby kangaroo.
But nobody takes my suggestions, so instead, our grandmother uses a walker; A big red cumbersome beast from Hell that hinders more than it helps. A process that should take 5 minutes takes an hour. We live in a very fast paced time, and it's jarring to have to slow to a crawl when we are with our grandmother.
Joanna and I are not at all fond of this "dentist." He reminds me of the dentist from "Little Shop of Horrors" only not as warm and kind. Granny was to only have one cavity filled, so imagine our surprise when he came out and told us that he basically decided "fuck it, let's just yank the sucker." He of course said that in a more delicate manner, but the meaning was the same.
We were in that terrible waiting room with it's terrible radio station for an hour and a half, so we should have figured he was up to something. This guy has that effect on my grandmother, the effect all men have on her; basically, she will just do whatever they say.
This is a common trend for her generation. My grandmother doesn't trust women, and she especially doesn't trust women dentists. That's why we have to drive a ridiculous distance to take her to this particular dentist, instead of the woman right down the street. Ironically enough, the woman dentist actually ran over her own grandmother with her car "accidentally", so maybe granny is right not to trust her. It would just be SO much more convenient...
Back to the rage. I'm not sure where it is our impatience comes from-it might be the fact we live in a world of instant gratification; everything is fast and concise and speedy. The english language has been abandoned in favor of letters representing words, and everything is "140 character or less." This isn't a good mindset when dealing with the elderly.
We DO need more patience and the mixed feelings of anger and guilt tend to offset that need in favor of the need for a drink. We yell at them because they are too slow, then feel guilty about it. Joanna and I have started to try to look at the humor and irony of it all. We try to laugh instead of yell. This hasn't really been working thus far, but at least it provides a strong argument for the legalization of marijuana. If people were to smoke pot before taking granny to the doctor, everything she said would be fucking hilarious.
-Kat
Monday, September 19, 2011
The Granny Diaries-Premier Entry
Hello everybody!
Welcome to the premier episode of "The Granny Diaries." This is our first ever attempt at blogging, or any social media for that matter, so please, bear with us.
Ok...here goes.
We want this to be a blog for the unsung heroes out there; the people who take care of the elderly. This is a vast array of people, ranging in age from child to senior. Everywhere you look, somebody is taking care of a parent or grandparent who is reaching the age of 100. Did you guys know that the first person to reach 200 years old may have already been born? Is this a good thing? We don't necessarily think so. Let's be honest-taking care of the elderly is fucking brutal, especially if they are like Alice.
Alice is our grandmother. She is a ninety year old Lebonese lady who uses guilt like currency. She has been cruel, she has been passive aggressive, she has been downright evil sometimes. She has also been sweet and generous, and that makes us feel like assholes for what we just wrote.
That there is the rub!
What we want to do with this blog is provide a safe haven for people like us. We are doing this for the people out there-the baby boomers who just can't get a break, the twenty-somethings (us) walking around Stop & Shop with a cart full of adult diapers for our grandmother, the people out there dealing with the elderly. We all need a support group, or at least stories to laugh at, because sometimes, that's all you have.
-Kat and JoJo
Welcome to the premier episode of "The Granny Diaries." This is our first ever attempt at blogging, or any social media for that matter, so please, bear with us.
Ok...here goes.
We want this to be a blog for the unsung heroes out there; the people who take care of the elderly. This is a vast array of people, ranging in age from child to senior. Everywhere you look, somebody is taking care of a parent or grandparent who is reaching the age of 100. Did you guys know that the first person to reach 200 years old may have already been born? Is this a good thing? We don't necessarily think so. Let's be honest-taking care of the elderly is fucking brutal, especially if they are like Alice.
Alice is our grandmother. She is a ninety year old Lebonese lady who uses guilt like currency. She has been cruel, she has been passive aggressive, she has been downright evil sometimes. She has also been sweet and generous, and that makes us feel like assholes for what we just wrote.
That there is the rub!
What we want to do with this blog is provide a safe haven for people like us. We are doing this for the people out there-the baby boomers who just can't get a break, the twenty-somethings (us) walking around Stop & Shop with a cart full of adult diapers for our grandmother, the people out there dealing with the elderly. We all need a support group, or at least stories to laugh at, because sometimes, that's all you have.
-Kat and JoJo
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